Hate

okay so the blog has been down. for ages i know. but it hasn’t been working, not my fault!!! i’ve come to so many conclusions in the last week it’s unbelievable and i’ve been so mad that my blog hasn’t been working as well. nothing at station court has changed and to be honest nothing ever will. british will be the way they are for forever, and as much as i despise parts of them.. i have to live with it, and i love some of them as well . i also realized how much i fucking love london. i dont want to leave here. i dont even want to live in sweden again. i love love love love love love london. its an amazing city. the people ive met and truly adore i want to keep for the rest of my life. they’re great friends. im not ready to leave this behind just because i cant get into a stupid university. im so sick of getting no’s. it’s not fair. i have the grades. ive done the work. so fuck you. im not going back to dallas. i know what will eventually happen. i will grow weak. i will do drugs and im not doing it. im not putting myself in that situation! i love stockholm but at the same time its too much like home. i want to be independent. i love being here. ive been happy here. i dont want to give it up because of university. i’d rather take a year off and try again. that’s not something i would even have considered a year ago.