Thoughts

Been thinking about what makes me unhappy. bread. cheese. showers. being alone. the unkind words. people who don’t believe in me. people who don’t understand. people who wont give me the time of day when all i do is have time for them. the past. the future. the present. everything. not being around family. not being with my friends. i want a support network. i used to have one, and now i’m all alone. there’s nobody here in london to tell me it’s alright. to tell me i’m strong enough to get through this. to tell me not to make stupid choices. to let me know that i deserve to be happy. i’m ready to fuck off and leave this shit behind, but it wont leave me. i don’t want to feel this way anymore. i don’t want to have to hold my stomach and cry every day. i don’t want to have to cover my mouth to keep from throwing up in the shower. i don’t want this and i don’t deserve this. i want to eat and not care. i want happiness.