[youtube width="425" height="25"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1B3amtSa2ZQ[/youtube]

just paid rent, and just had to think to myself how lucky i am. lucky i’ve got such supportive parents. lucky i’ve got the privilege to live and study in london. lucky to have lived the last 10 months in marylebone.

i love my flat. i wish it was different in some aspects, but looking at moving makes me appreciate how great it’s been to live here. lucky to have been where i have been. lucky to be coming home to this.

i don’t want to leave marylebone, i don’t want to downgrade. i’m being a spoiled brat i know, but you can’t blame me. if you were in my situation you’d understand as well.

it’s been a luxury living here, and i’m so lucky that my parents have been willing to put up for the rent.

so thank you mamma and pappa, words can’t describe how happy it’s made me. how much of a convenience and luxury it’s been! to grateful i have you two.

parents have been nagging on about me finding a new flat so i’ve been sat for the last hour looking around. after finding absolutely nothing i started to imagine what my life could be like. if i had a boyfriend willing to move in with me i could live in the middle of camden, looking over the canal.. and still pay less than i do now..

i’m becoming delusional. need to stop dreaming and get back to reality.

in a really weird mood today. last night was good. it’s laura’s birthday today so we got her a cupcake and sang happy birthday at midnight. then when everyone decided to go to bed, irish alex and i managed to stay up till 4 chatting away. girls.

going to look at a room to rent today in primrose hill.. a bit scared, i dont know why, i just am. then after dinner i’m going to meet up with allie at leicester square!

dragged Simon along to see a flat with me today and wow. if any of the other flat’s are like the one i saw today i’ll be a happy girl. small kitchen, small bathroom. pretty dirty, but a  good scrubbing will clear all of that. in a lovely little area. also it’s got it’s own patio! awesome. i’m not sure how i’m going to handle it, but i’m guessing i’ve got to hold off on getting a place for a while. i’ll be gone all june and some of july, so maybe august would be better. plus then i don’t have to pay double rent, seems pretty pointless! but it was a ten minute walk to my university, and so central it took us like 15 to get to oxford street. i want i want i want to move now!

woke up feeling tired tired tired. but i dragged myself out of bed, and then went to get breakfast. boy’s flat door was locked. so i had to wait till one of them got back from their exam for some food. not having food always makes me grumpy. ate breakfast. and now i’m just sat here feeling really angry for some reason. maybe it was because i started looking at flats and realized i have no money, and will not be able to afford anything. debbie downer i know, but whatever. pissed off, going to do some bullshit work for uni and whatever. maybe take a walk just because it’s so nice outside, and that will have to cheer me up.

it sounds so much easier than it actually is to find a place where you want to live. not just stay around but live. live for a full year. a tiny space that you have to make your own. so far my search hasn’t produced any results. only people trying to get you to send money through westernunion, no thanks!