another day at uni today. got through my mid-term last week. so now there’s only three more weeks to go. i don’t know if i feel like i’m halfway finished, or halfway into a course. let’s just hope i pass global politics and management in film..

so i’ve gotten a lot done today. finished my coursework for one of my modules, i hope it’s at least good enough for a pass. they didn’t really give us a lot of work to do so i had to just figure some things out. so now i’m thinking a new episode of the pacific and bed? gym early tomorrow then uni and more coursework!

im jealous. i am jealous of the people in the states finished with their first year at college. the people in sweden graduating. the people who know where their life is going. the people on their way to being graduated. the people getting to start fresh, and choose a school. here i am sat in the dark, wondering if i can even pass this year. if i don’t pass i loose my place at regent’s college. if i don’t i have no clue what to do. i don’t want to waste another year. i don’t want to do it. i don’t want to leave london. i don’t know how i’ll handle it. im scared. what if i fall apart. what if i turn back to what i was. if i pass i’ll still be worried. no place to live. no clue where to look for a place to live. no clue what to look for. no clue if i’ll be happy. no clue if it’ll be close enough to the college. no idea if i’ll be able to keep in touch with people from halls. scared to test my relationship. im scared. im scared i’ll be forgotten. replaced. placed in a line of importance. im scared of change.